The Invader Zim Faculty
by IcePrincess777
Summary: A parody of the movie "The Faculty" with Simpsons characters. Finally completed!!!!!
1. Spooky PreScenes

Yayzz! This is my second Invader Zim fanfic. It's a parody of "The Faculty"(which I don't own) with IZ characters. There are oh SOO many hidden cameos, mostly from Simpsons characters and teachers that are unfortunate enough to have had me as a student in the past. As you may have guessed, I OWN NONE OF THESE CHARACTERS!!!  
  
  
  
Chapter 1: Spooky Pre-Scenes  
  
  
  
Golf team practice.  
  
Coach/Custodian Willie: Get that ball in the hole and get it there right NOW!!! DAMN!! You missed!! * lip quivers * Alright, practice is over. * team leaves as Red turns around and flips him the bird *  
  
Willie: * stunned * I think he just flicked me off! * sobs *  
  
* mysterious person walks up behind him*  
  
Willie: *sniff* Yeah? What do you want?!  
  
(screen fades and comes back in the Principal's office)  
  
Principal Skinner: First of all, no Teacher #1 you can't have a giant Pez(don't own it) dispenser in the teacher's lounge! And if you want TV in the bathroom stalls, you're going to have to pay for it with your own money. And the Drama Club will not receive that $50,000 you requested, Ms. Krebaple. Are you insane?  
  
Ms.Krebaple: Quite possibly.  
  
Skinner: Great! I like them like that! Okay, meeting adjourned!  
  
* all of the teachers leave except Willie*  
  
Skinner: What do you want?  
  
Willie: You look completely disgusting tonight.  
  
Skinner: *blushes* Why thank you!  
  
Willie: Can I have that knife behind you so I can gut you and run around the school like a maniac?  
  
Skinner: * hands Willie a big, long steak knife * Okay! You do that!  
  
Willie: Now hold out your hand so I can stab you.  
  
Skinner: Is this going to hurt?  
  
Willie: Yes.  
  
Skinner: * whimpers * Fine. * holds out hand *  
  
Willie: * can only give him the equivalent of a paper cut because the knife is rubber* Damn you, evil prop people! * chases Skinner around the school until they come to the door*  
  
Skinner: That was fun!  
  
Ms. Krebaple: (os) Seymour! What are you doing alone in a dark building with someone else?  
  
Skinner: Oh, I seem to have forgotten my keys. I'll come back to your jealous rant after I go get them. I wouldn't want to miss an opportunity to be chased through the building by a knife-wielding homicidal maniac! * gets keys and returns to the door*  
  
Ms. Krebaple: There's one now! * point to Willie at the other end of the hallway* Willie: *lightning flashes behind him* I found a real knife! And the first person I used it on was the evil prop director! * raises blood covered knife *  
  
Prop Director's friend: hey! You killed Kenny!  
  
Willie: Shut up! * runs into door*  
  
Skinner: (os) Problem solved! Say, why are you looking at me like you've been possessed by an alien and are about to use the knife Willie dropped to kill me? Ms. Krebaple: Because I am, genius! * kills Skinner*  
  
Nny: HEY! That's my job!  
  
Ms. Krebaple: Since when were you in this fanfic?  
  
Nny: Since you stole my knife.  
  
Ms. Krebaple: I am an alien life form, do not bother stabbing me with one of your many other knives.  
  
Nny: Ooooo! Aliens! So where are you from?  
  
(screen fades out)  
  
  
  
  
  
In front of Springfield Elementary Skool, a car hits three kids while pulling up to the school. Luckily, they were cheerleaders. Dib is picked up by jocks and has his head flushed down an outdoor Porta-Potty(I don't own this). The screen freezes as his crap covered, very large head is pulled out of the toilet. (freeze) Dib, Sci-Fi obsessed geek(end freeze). A girl in black clothes walks by, laughing to herself.(freeze) Gaz, goth girl and Gameslave 2 addict(end freeze). Nearby, a group of cheerleaders shows Tak obsessing over a broken nail.(freeze) Tak, popular ditz, head cheerleader, editor of "The Weekly Load of Libel"(end freeze) Then we see a jock being tackled by fellow golf players.(freeze) Red, golf team captain, airheaded jock who only gains depth during the last five minutes of the movie(end freeze). In the bathroom, we see Dib vomiting. Wait, I already introduced him. Oh, next to Dib, something that resembles a drug deal is going on.  
  
Snackjunkie #1: So you'll give us 3 bags of Skittles for $5?  
  
Snackjunkie #2: It was $3 last week!  
  
Purple: Do you know how hard it is to get these past Skinner? You would think that a principal wouldn't need to turn to students for his candy!  
  
Snackjunkies: Fine. * cough up the dough and take the Skittles*  
  
Purple: Aahhh, the life of a Snack Dealer.  
  
(freeze) Purple, Snack Dealer who has repeated the sixth grade five times(end freeze). Back outside, we see a badly disguised Zim with a blonde wig, blue contact lenses and a southern accent, posing as the new girl. He walks up to someone in a Scary Movie Killer costume and demands, "TAKE THE ALMIGHTY ZIM TO YOUR LEADER!!!" The person in the costume points to the door as the screen freezes once again. (freeze) Zim, Irken posing as the new girl. (end freeze) Zim then goes to the office to get his schedule.  
  
1st Period- Be introduced to the dumbness of the plotline.  
  
2nd Period- Become discovered.  
  
3rd Period- Use clichéd storylines to create a Red Herring and move the attention away from yourself.  
  
4th Period- Have possessed minions attack your friends.  
  
5th Period- Be exposed. Literally!  
  
6th Period- Die. Just DIIEEEEEE!!!!!  
  
Zim: 6th period sounds good!* goes to find his first period class.*  
  
  
  
A/N: Is this a good beginning? TELL MEEE!!!! I must know!!! *sugar wears off * Anyway, just review please. 


	2. In the Hallway, First Period

YEAH!!! People reviewed!!! I still don't own any characters from IZ or the Simpsons.  
  
  
  
Chapter 2: In the Hallway, First Period  
  
  
  
  
  
Tak is talking to a bunch of her cheerleader friends as Red taps her on the shoulder. Red: I need to talk to you.  
  
As they walk away, Tak's friends whisper among themselves.  
  
Tak: So what is it, my golf team captain, fake boyfriend?  
  
Red: That's what I wanted to talk to you about.  
  
Tak: Huh?  
  
Red: I'm quitting the golf team so I can concentrate on passing the sixth grade. You wouldn't want to go onto seventh grade without me, would you?  
  
Tak: You do realize this means you're not my fake boyfriend anymore, right?  
  
Red: What?! How shallow is that?! Why are you dumping me just because I'm not the golf team captain anymore?!  
  
Tak: Stereotypical Elementary Skool Kid's Unwritten Law.  
  
Red: It's not unwritten anymore. It's now in convenient index card form. * gives Tak the index card *  
  
Tak: And can't you read? "The golf team captain always dates the head cheerleader." Red: But it's stupid!!! It's shallow!!!  
  
Tak: It's a teen movie, what do you expect? * walks back to her friends, putting on a fake crying and "HE DUMPED ME!!!" act *  
  
In the Teacher's Lounge  
  
Nurse Flanders (Maude) is sitting on the couch with pneumonia.  
  
Teacher #1: Most people would start using their sick days about now.  
  
Nurse Flanders: * smallpox appear * No, I'm saving those for when I feel better. Teacher #1: Well, I guess that fits in with the nonsense motif of horror movies. Teacher #2: Excuse me, my arm is bleeding very heavily right now. Could you please help me?  
  
Nurse Flanders: What do I look like, a nurse?  
  
Teacher #2: * drops dead *  
  
Teacher #1: You are.  
  
Flanders: Oh yeah. * Willie enters, goes over to the Tang cooler and takes multiple drinks. *  
  
Teacher #1: Whoa! He's thirsty! Just looking at him makes me want to go! * pssssssssssss *  
  
Willie: Will you please stop defecating on my shoe?  
  
Teacher #1: No.  
  
Willie: I'll get you later. ( evil glint in his eye and an OOC smile ) Why Nurse Flanders! You look extremely gruesome today!  
  
Flanders: * puddle of sweat forms on the floor * Thank you, Coach/Custodian Willie. Willie: I have an earache.  
  
Flanders: That's nice.  
  
Willie: Can you fix it for me?  
  
Flanders: This IS a horror movie, and turning my back on either you or Ms. Krebaple will probably mean certain death, but what's a horror movie without some gaping plot holes? Willie: Right about that! * breaks Maude's nail *  
  
Maude: The pain!!! THE PAIN!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
First Period  
  
Ms. Bitters: Class, we have a new student who will share our DOOM. Her name is Zim and she's from somewhere south of here. (remember, Zim is in drag because he's playing Marybeth.)  
  
Dib: * gets up on his desk to start ranting *  
  
Purple: Dib, don't even start that "He's an alien" rant. (class giggles)  
  
Dib: I wasn't! I was going to prove something else about them! * points accusingly at Zim *  
  
Purple: Like what?! This talking is interfering with my sugar high.  
  
Dib: SHE'S A MAN, BABY!!!!!!!!!! * clamps hand over his mouth * That has to be the most OOC thing I've ever said!  
  
Red: Right Austin. Now if you would cut out your OOC quotes, I have to get back to flirting with your sister and fulfilling this movie's requirements for unrealistic romance. Gaz: Hehehe! I like the use of big words! That's not common in jocks!  
  
Dib: HEY! That's my sister! BACK OFF!!!!  
  
Ms. Bitters: * drinks a glass of Tang * Okay class, since your entire extended family will be doomed, I want you to make a family tree of all those among them that are living. Any questions?  
  
Purple: Why do cows moo? (laughter among most students)  
  
Red: Will this be on the Final Exam of DOOM?  
  
Ms. Bitters: This IS the Final Exam. * OOC niceness * But take DOOM off the end!  
  
  
  
Oh, I forgot. I don't own Tang or Final Exams of DOOM either. But if anyone knows the person who does, could you please kill them? (just kidding) 


	3. Second Period

Yayzz! Thank you, to all those who reviewed! I still don't own Invader Zim or The Simpsons, as you may have noticed. Or Tang. Or Skittles. Or Spongebob. Scherpie and Hernia own themselves.  
  
Chapter 3: 2nd Period  
  
  
  
  
  
Purple is cracking open a vending machine in the Science Supply Room.  
  
Zim: So you get your kicks from stealing snacks from vending machines?  
  
Purple: I would use all that money I make from selling them, but that would make far too much sense. So why are you dressed up as a girl?  
  
Zim: So they don't suspect I'm an alien!  
  
Purple: Red, Tak and I aren't wearing disguises, yet YOU'RE the one that would have been discovered if I hadn't made Dib look stupid.  
  
Zim: * silence *  
  
Dib: ( listening through the vents ) * falls out of the ceiling * Hah! Now I get to see how aliens make out! * takes a picture of Zim and Purple staring at him like he was insane. Which he is. *  
  
Purple: How is it that humans are tall, but so dumb? We weren't doing anything, idiot. Dib: If you weren't doing anything, then what's that sound?  
  
( something else is heard coming down the vent ) * Bart Simpson slides out * Bart: What's shaking, man?  
  
Purple, Zim, Dib: * stare *  
  
Dib: Did you just wake up from a ten year coma?  
  
Bart: Probably. Well, gotta run! Nurse Flanders is having her mandatory tonsil examination, which just REALLY disrupts the flow of my day!  
  
Dib: Tonsil examinations? Since when did we have those?  
  
Bart: Since something really weird happened to all of the teachers! They're acting so. different! And drinking Tang all of the time! It's like they've been possessed my some creature that lives off of it! Hope I didn't give away too much of the plot!  
  
Zim: No, I'm sure that there are still parts of the plot that haven't been blatantly revealed yet.  
  
Bart: Well, bye! * runs out of the room *  
  
Dib: * Immediately turns to Zim and points at him accusingly * Okay, the sudden need for tonsil examinations? Teachers drinking too much Tang? WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO DO WITH ALL OF THIS?!?!  
  
Zim: * sweating * Nothing! What makes you think that I would have anything to do with this?  
  
Dib: Only that you almost ALWAYS have some evil plan to take over the world! Purple: ( sounding extremely irritated ) Dib, just shut up already! He's not doing anything! JUST SHUT UP!!  
  
Dib: * backs out of the room, frightened by an angry creature twice his height * Outside  
  
Dib is still running from Purple when he finally realizes that he's just been running around the track for half an hour. Then he collapses on the ground and sees something very... Interesting. It looked like a little Spongebob Squarepants figure. It had a look on its face that was pure evil! The bell rang and Dib picked up the thing and headed for Science class.  
  
  
  
Science Class  
  
Scherpie: Okay, class! Today I'm having an identity crisis! Yesterday, I was a Social Studies teacher at Bitchland Pork. Today, I found that I was transferred to Springfield Elementary Skool and that I had been teaching science for the past year! Just like in "The Sixth Sense" where the shrink was dead for a year and didn't even notice! * drinks Tang * By the way, I get to have drinks in class, but you don't because I have a self-invented medical condition that requires me to drink stuff to prevent from someone having to peel me off the floor with a rubber spatula.  
  
Dib: Excuse me, Mr. Scherpie!  
  
Scherpie: ( OOC niceness ) Yes, Bib?  
  
Dib: Why do you always misspell my name? It's as if you do it intentionally. Scherpie: That's correct! ( getting REALLY OOC now!)  
  
Dib: Anyway, I found something out on the track and was wondering what it was. * gives him the Spongebob figure *  
  
Scherpie: Despite my complete lack of scientific knowledge, I think you have discovered a new species!  
  
Red: Lemme see! Lemme see! * knocks Tang all over the figure *  
  
Purple: Oh, nice going Red!  
  
The figure starts squirming on the table as if it was coming to life after a long sleep. Scherpie puts the figure into a fish tank filled with Tang, where it swims around, now spreading out extra fins.  
  
Hernia: * the evil TV Studio teacher and his trembling mole enter the room * Hmm, this thing seems more evil than me. I should kill it now! * sticks his hand in the tank. The figure then bites him. Hernia screams and cries like a baby. * Scherpie runs to the bathroom. ( law of physics that I just made up: What goes in must come out.)  
  
Class: * cheers * Yes! Down with Hernia!  
  
*everyone pulls knives out of their boots *  
  
Tak: * stab* That's for saying my article was stupid!  
  
Lisa Simpson: * stab* That's for giving me an A-!  
  
Purple: That's for confiscating my Skittles! * stab* ( The bell rings and all of the students leave, except for those unfortunate enough to be main characters.)  
  
Hernia suddenly turns yellow and develops holes in his skin.  
  
Dib: A-a-are you okay?  
  
Hernia: * slips a knife into his hand with an OOC smile * Never better.  
  
Purple: Awww. My shuggee high just ran out. * pulls out some Skittles *  
  
Hernia: * raises knife over his head *  
  
Purple: (sugar starts affecting him) AAAAAHHH!!! THE CRAZY MAN OF CRAZINESS IS GONNA GET MEEEE!!!!! * Skittles fly everywhere, including at Hernia *  
  
  
  
Hernia: Aww, crap! Not the Skittles! * dies on the floor *  
  
Purple: Okay, that was weird.  
  
Dib: No, wait! It was something about those Skittles that made him die!  
  
Tak: Skittles taste bad with Tang, everyone knows that!  
  
Dib: And that's what made him die! Tak! You're a genius! But does this mean I have to have a pathetic one-way crush on her until the author decides to put me out of my misery?  
  
Red: But she's MY fake girlfriend!  
  
Tak: No, I fake broke up with you for very shallow reasons, remember?  
  
Red: Then where does that leave me?  
  
Gaz: Well, I'm supposed to have a stupid , OOC crush on you, even though I'm supposed to be a pretend lesbian.  
  
Purple: And don't forget me and Zim! That's even OOC in the original movie!  
  
Dib: And the way the original director made it look like I also had a crush on Gaz in some parts! INCEST!!! This is like being stuck in a bad soap opera!  
  
Tak: Well, this IS a teen movie and directors for this type of movie always stereotype to the extreme.  
  
Red: Wait, you're a cheerleader and you just said something that made sense. That's going against the stereotype!  
  
Tak: That's because this is a parody, not the original movie.  
  
Dib: Anyway, why does "teen movie" have to be synonymous with "crappy romance"? Purple: The second mystery of the world. The other being why Skittles taste so good and make me so HYYYPER!!!  
  
Tak: Artificial flavoring and sugar.  
  
Gaz: I don't know about you guys, but I'm going to get out of here before Hernia starts to smell.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
To be continued. Please review! 


	4. TAKE THE SKITTLES!

Are you psychic? This quick test should tell you. Just use your spooky powers to find out what I'm going to say next. If you said, " I don't own Invader Zim, the Simpsons, Tang, Skittles or Spongebob Squarepants, the golf team people own themselves", CONGRATULATIONS!! You are a psycho psychic! Now go predict murders or something. Or since you're here you can just read this story.  
  
Chapter 4: TAKE THE SKITTLES!!!  
  
  
  
Red: Okay, we have to get out of here! Let's just go to the parking lot, act natural going through the halls.  
  
Everyone leaves the room and walks down the hallway. As they look at the people beside them, they see that they appear to be moving in slow motion, alerting even the dullest of viewers that something is up with them. They get out the front door and see the same slow motion staring.  
  
Purple: Aw, screw this! Run like hell for my car!!! * everyone runs for Purple's car, which they somehow know the exact location of* * once everyone is in but Red, the golf team is seen coming up to the car*  
  
Paul: Red! Don't you want to be possessed by Spongebob, I mean, play some golf with us?  
  
Red: Golf sounds good, but I don't like the possessing part. Well, chow! * gets in the car as it speeds off. Five minutes and two dead pedestrians later, they pull up in front of Purple's house*  
  
Zim: * whispers to Purple* Wow! Your house looks EXACTLY like all of the others! Purple: * whispers to Zim* Unlike you, I have more accurate methods of researching. REAL teenage humans have Skittles in their basements and parents that are always mysteriously away so they can have parties!  
  
Zim: * whispers to Purple* I see! I shall have to modify my base when I get back from this hideous horror movie!  
  
* they all get out of the car and go to Purple's basement*  
  
Purple: Okay, first things first. Since we know that Skittles kill the Spongebob things, everyone has to take one. Dib, you first.  
  
Dib: Why me?  
  
Purple: Because the sky is blue.  
  
Dib: What does that have to do with.  
  
Purple: Spongebob is taking over the school and all you can do is complain! Just take it!!! Dib: Fine. * eats a Skittle and gets sugar energy * Hehehe! I is a crazy fanfic author! * hugs Tak *  
  
Tak: Ewww! Get it off me!  
  
Purple: * pulls knife out of thin air, like all those horror movie killers seem to do* He's on a sugar high, let him be. Now you Red.  
  
Red: *takes the knife * First say "Lasers are cool!"  
  
Purple: But they aren't! Smoke machines rock!  
  
Red: *eyes narrowing * Say it or eat metal!!!  
  
Purple: *sigh * Lasers are cool. * eats a Skittle and takes the knife * Now, TAKE THE SKITTLES!!!  
  
Red: * eats a Skittle *  
  
Purple: * points knife at Gaz* Now you.  
  
Gaz: Do I have to turn my Gameslave off for this?  
  
Purple: Yes.  
  
Gaz: * takes a Skittle * You will pay for this. * threatening tone *  
  
Purple: Now you two. * holds out the Skittles to Zim and Tak *  
  
Zim: Why must I ingest the filthy Skittles?!  
  
Tak: I'll only do it if he goes first.  
  
Purple: You'll both take it at the same time.  
  
Zim: * is CLEARLY seen eating a Skittle!!!*  
  
Tak: * throws it across the room while she turns yellow and gets holes in her skin. Then she knocks over some stuff on the table and runs out the door to a flying saucer which flies away to . ... someplace. *  
  
Purple: Soooo.... Any ideas where she just went?  
  
Red: To the golf game to be with the other Spongebob people?  
  
Purple: It would be exceedingly stupid to go right back to be with the aliens, but that's what this movie is about!  
  
Five minutes and two dead pedestrians later, the arrive back at the Springfield Elementary Skool. It is now dark.  
  
Dib: Why is it nighttime? There's no way that taking the Skittles could have taken all day!  
  
Gaz: Dib, just shut up and stop pointing out inconsistencies.  
  
The golf team is seen getting so many hole-in-ones that the audience is bored into a deep sleep. All except the resurrected Principal Skinner and Ms. Krebaple. Gaz and Red immediately stand out as the only ones walking around. AS they leave to go to the gym, Skinner follows them.  
  
Skinner: What are you children doing in the gym after hours?  
  
*Red and Purple take the volleyball net down *  
  
Skinner: What are you doing?  
  
Red, Purple: Nothing.  
  
Skinner: Oh. Carry on then while I chastise your friends. AAHHH!! * Red and Purple throw the volleyball net over Skinner and Dib gives Skinner a Skittle * Dib: Eat this.  
  
Skinner: You tied me up in a volleyball net to force me to eat Skittles? I'll never understand you students.  
  
Dib: You know the real reason!  
  
Skinner: Do not.  
  
Dib: Do too.  
  
Skinner: Do not!  
  
Dib: Do too!  
  
Skinner: DO NOT!!!!  
  
Dib: DO TOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Red: SHUT UUUUUPPP!!!!! * stabs Skinner with the knife. *(yup, it's still there!) *Skinner falls to the ground in a pool of his own blood *  
  
Dib: He gets possessed by Spongebob but can't withstand a single knife would? To the tip of his finger?!  
  
Skinner: * starts to get up as Zim throws the whole bag of Skittles at Skinner. Skinner then falls back down and starts dissolving*  
  
Dib: But what if that wasn't the leader?  
  
Gaz: What does the leader have to do with it?  
  
Dib: In some science fiction book that has nothing to do with this, the ones possessed returned to normal after their leader was killed.  
  
Red: Oooooh. I could go outside and see if anyone is back to normal.  
  
Gaz: Wait. Unnecessary love scene time. * kisses Red despite the extreme height difference *  
  
*Red goes out into the rain as Dib cracks up in the corner *  
  
Gaz: Dib, shut the hell up. * punches Dib *  
  
  
  
  
  
A/N: Hi! Future updates might be a little slow, I'm writing another story that I'm hoping to eventually turn into a book. It's about conspiracies and aliens, so if you like Zim you would probably like the story! 


	5. Bees Are Scary

A/N: Reviews make me so happy, like a preppy at a Crackstreet Boys concert! ( Thank you to all those who supplied that demonic comparison! I still don't own IZ or the Simpsons or Scream if You Know What I Did Last Friday the Thirteenth. If I did, I wouldn't be writing fanfiction. Instead, I would be fighting a homicidal rage at the pure idiocy of this fic. ( Sorry, Jhonen!) And now, the fifth installment of the hideously disfigured fic known as... The Invader Zim Faculty!  
  
Chapter 5: Bees Are Scary  
  
  
  
  
  
Dib: * looks at watch * We've been waiting five minutes! Where the heck is Red?! Red: * runs up to the window, presses his face against it and whispers in a creepy, demonic tone * Hello, Cindy. Scream if you know what I did last Friday the thirteenth! * grins and bursts out laughing at the horrified looks on everyone's faces * HAHAHA!!!! Just kidding!! Now let me back in!  
  
Purple: Was anyone normal?  
  
Red: Well, no. I think the leader is Coach/Custodian Willie. I tried to get him, but the janitor was too fast for a star golf player!  
  
Purple: How do we know you're not one of them now?  
  
Red: If I was, would I still be dumb enough to talk about myself in the third person? Dib: But you could just be saying that to get us to let you in!  
  
Purple: If you're not one of them, prove it! Eat the Skittle!  
  
Red: I dropped mine!  
  
Dib: We only have one left.  
  
Purple: Fine. * slides last Skittle under the door *  
  
Red: * picks it up* Okay! I'm making unnecessary efforts to stall, so you KNOW I'm one of them! * throws Skittle away*  
  
Purple: SHIT!! Not him too!  
  
Gaz: * has a look of absolute shock on her face *  
  
Red: Join us, Gaz. We want you. I want you! There is no pain with us!!  
  
( reminder, it's still raining!)  
  
Purple: Really? Your skin is smoking from the water, is THAT pain?  
  
Red: * eye twitches in pain * yeesssSSSSSS!!!! AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!! * runs away * In the gym.  
  
Dib: So we're out of Skittles, our numbers are dwindling, the Spongebob things are still loose and we STILL don't know who the leader is!  
  
Purple: I think I might have some extra Skittles in my car. Which is right out there in the middle of Spongebob territory.  
  
Zim: Why don't you just go get more from the Science Supply Room?  
  
Purple: No, that would make too much sense. Come, Dib! To our impending possessions! *Purple and Dib go out to the parking lot *  
  
*the golf team is seen marching around the corner *  
  
Purple: Dib! You go distract them while I get the Skittles from my car!  
  
Dib: And how would I escape possession?  
  
Purple: * shrugs * I dunno. That's your problem. * runs toward his car, which is only a few feet away *  
  
Willie: Team! Get the one with the gigantic head! * the golf team runs to Dib * Dib: HEY!! My head's normal and .. Oh, maybe I should start running now. * runs into a bus * * Purple gets in his car, and team is in another bus. An announcer appears from nowhere*  
  
Announcer: Gentlemen, start your engines! * a tall, thin red haired man appears from nowhere * ( note to the braindead, HIDDEN CAMEO!!)  
  
Jhonen: Hey! Where did my ice sucky go?  
  
Announcer: The first one to run him over wins! GO!!  
  
*he runs into Dib's bus as the golf team and Purple chase him* * Jhonen drives away , followed by the golf team. Purple crashes into another bus. *  
  
Purple: OOOWWWW!!!!!  
  
Dib: HE RAN OVER MEEEE!!!! This wasn't in the script!!!  
  
CUT!!! ( Note to the audience: I regret to inform you that the editor has fallen asleep at the wheel again. Let's just cut to inside. )  
  
Zim: I see no point in beating around the bush, I'm the leader of the Spongebob things. Gaz: Well, duh! Dib only rants about it every two seconds!  
  
Zim: * transforms into giant Spongebob thing *  
  
Dib: See?! I told you it was Zim!!!  
  
Gaz: Shut up and run!!  
  
Zim: * goes for a swim in the Tang filled pool and Gaz and Dib go near it instead of taking one of the many doors out *  
  
Once they are in the locker room, Zim comes out of the pool in a bee costume * Purple: What are you guys doing in the locker room? And why is Zim in a bee costume? Gaz: He's the leader, duh.  
  
Purple: Zim, as your Tallest, I command you to eat this Skittle.  
  
Zim: I ate one the first time, but there are so many damn plot holes that that one didn't affect me.  
  
Purple: Take it or I'll just send someone else to invade Earth!  
  
Zim: * takes it* Wait, how am I supposed to invade if I'm. AAAAAHHHHH!!!!!  
  
Purple: That was easy.  
  
Dib: HEY!!! YOU STOLE MY ROLE!!1 I WAS SUPPOSED TO KILL ZIM!!!!  
  
Purple: Shut up! * shoves Zim in a cage and walks out with Gaz on his arm *  
  
The next day.  
  
Purple is on the cover of all the magazines and is surrounded by every girl in the school. Dib: That was MY role! HEY!!! * is dragged off to the insane asylum again *  
  
Many miles away.  
  
Jhonen: Yes!!! I finally lost the evil golf team!!! Awww, shit! Cliff!!!! * the bus goes over a cliff and into the ocean *  
  
Later.  
  
Jhonen: * washes up on the beach * I will get you, IcePrincess777, I WILL GET YOU IF IT'S THE LAST THING I DOO!!! And knowing you, it will be. * passes out from exhaustion *  
  
  
  
  
  
Yayyyy!!!! Completed finally!!! * passes out on keyboard * 


End file.
